Left 4 Dead 2 Demo: My Thoughts

*cracks her knuckles* Alright. I finally decided to download the demo for Left 4 Dead 2 just to see what my friends were freaking out over. Now, I'm not a fan of survival horror games, or most horror games in general (except for a few, like Fatal Frame and Ju-On The Grudge). Anyway, I know a lot of my steam friends praise this game to high hell and I know a bunch of them will definitely not agree with me on my opinion of Left 4 Dead 2. Whenever I said I wanted to play the first game before this one, all my friends were like, "Psht. No one plays the first game anymore. Everyone is playing the second one." Gee, sorry I like to play games in there sequential order. Regardless, here we go.

I know I only played the demo so I don't have the whole story and the times I did play with other random people in multiplayer mode (since everyone says multiplayer is the best way to play the game), they never spoke in any way at all and half the time one or more of them were shooting teammates during the missions. To be honest, they all could've been playing the game for the first time, just like me. At first I had no idea at all what the fuck to do. I wasn't told how to shoot (it was the only easy thing to figure out though, left click of course) or god forbid pick up and item until half-way through the first level I played. I was just sitting there trying every god damn key on my keyboard hoping to figure it out until finally I was told that I use the 'E' key for pretty much everything in the game; opening doors, climbing up ladders (that took me a while too), picking up items and weapons, and helping up your teammates when they get knocked down.

As far as the characters go, I wasn't really interested in any of their stories except Ellis, the southern accented guy of the team. Not sure why really. He seemed to be the only comedic character so I suppose I gravitate towards people that can make me laugh. As far as the graphics go, they're okay. The maps I did see were well made and looked pretty good. The AI of the zombies and your teammates are good as well. The chargers, jockeys, witches, smokers, and boomers creeped me out most definitely. Before playing any of the Left 4 Dead games I knew a little bit about them from hearing friends talk about it. I knew what smokers sounded like and I knew everything about boomers. God boomers scare me. The idea of being puked on is incredibly disgusting to me so I run like hell when I see or hear a boomer. *shudders*

This is a short little review because, like I said, I only played the demo. Maybe I might play the whole game. Maybe. The game was a little too repetitive to me. One of my friends argued with me about that too. I really don't find the mission of killing the same handful of zombies over and over and over again very appealing. My friend argued saying, "Well then, Team Fortress 2 is repetitive as well." Perhaps, but in TF2 you are certain that you are playing with and against real people, not AIs half the time. You have to work together as a team AND try and counter whatever the opposing team is doing. I'm sure versus mode in L4D2 is similar, but to me it sounds kinda boring to just kill the opposing team every round. It would be like if the only game type on TF2 that we had to choose from was 'arena' over and over instead of the plentiful interesting modes we do have, like 'control points' and 'payload'. All in all, I'm not of fan of Left 4 Dead.

I'm hoping to save some more money to help me out for my trip to Anime Nebraskon this year. I've been DJing my ass off on Second Life for tips and not really earning much. Thank goodness I already paid for the 3-day pass, but I still have to have money for food and gas money. Nyeh.

Problems...

Last night was really upsetting and scary. I had an asthma attack and stopped breathing. Then I ended up having a bit of an anxiety attack later on in the night. I'm not going to go into detail as to why it happened, but I hope everything is okay now. I had a really confusing and scary nightmare as well that involved me be choked again. (I've been having many like this within the past month or so) I woke up twice in the middle of the night, gasping hard for air both times. Taking a breathing treatment helped a bit, but not much. My asthma is really starting to worry me and I don't really know what to do.

I also definitely need to work more on the packets my new therapist gave me to read. I really feel like drawing again as well, to get out some of the icky feelings I have built up in me lately. I'm sure its a good idea to get the feelings out of me before I end up exploding at people. The last thing I want is to fuck things up further. And I promised myself I would never hurt myself again. I keep telling myself its not worth it, ever. My boyfriend seems to think I'd hurt myself though, and I wish I could assure him that I wouldn't. I'm trying so hard to push forward, regardless of what may kick me back to the ground.

At least my cat wants to be around me though. I love that she's always near me, no matter how icky I feel. *snuggles Luna* I don't know what I'd do without her. She knows when I don't feel good and makes sure she never leaves my side. Maybe I'm just as clingy as she is, but I know I'm clingy for the same reasons as her. I have no one else to cling to or snuggle with. I'll stop this before I sound too depressing I guess. I really do love my boyfriend, more than anything. I just really hope that everything will get better for us.

Oh. My friend Ross is coming over next week sometime, which will be nice. I get more RAM for my computer, and maybe a better PSU. Its nice that at least one friend of mine is willing to visit me and such. He definitely has to listen to this horrible humming/grinding sounds my tower keeps making. Its driving me nuts. But yeah, I should go shower soon because I'm going to attempt to bowl tonight. Attempt being the keyword of course.

Christmas Morning!

I hope everyone is having a happy holiday season. Its Christmas morning and I got nothing. Haha. Not like I was expecting anything anyway. I never do. Less disappointment that way. I've been awake all night, as usual, and so I don't think I'm gonna go to my dad's today to celebrate. Grams has work and my mom and step-dad are probably going to be with his family so I'll have the house to myself to sing and talk to my friends. Its too fucking cold anyhow, and I feel ill because my nose will not stop running. Regardless though, I got to talk to my boyfriend last night and that made me happy. Yesterday was our one month mark so yippee for us. I love him more than air... and I'm an asthmatic. Bad joke, but you get the point. He sent me a Christmas package earlier this week and it hasn't gotten to me yet. I haven't been able to send his present because I always end up sleeping all damn day. Gah. You'll get your package before the first of the year honey, I am going to try my best. I love you Jason. Merry Christmas.

Christmas Time!

This Christmas is going to be fun and happy. I'm going to make sure of it. I have a boyfriend I love to death who loves me back just as much, I finally got heat in my apartment again, I have Christmas presents to send and receive, and I get to spend time with the family members I love the most. I'm trying my best to stay optimistic this year. I'm very thankful I have everything I have. I love you Jason, so very very much. You are the best thing that could ever happen to me and I'm happy, yes happy, to be in love with someone that loves me back, flaws and all.

I hope everyone has a Happy Christmas this year and Happy Holidays.

Not much has happened really since the last post I made. I officially got fired from my job 2 weeks ago and I'm actually glad. I hated working at Walmart so much. So now I'm back to brokeville. *sigh*

I went to Anime Nebraskon in November and it was very fun this year. I got to take my best friend with me so now she's been to an anime convention. This year was my second Nebraskon and I can't wait to go next year. This year I was a catgirl on Friday, Beat from Jet Grind Radio on Saturday (no one recognized me which made me sad), and we didn't go on Sunday because we were too fucking tired. I also met up with an adorable guy that lives not too far from me and we get to hang out this week hopefully.

I also gained a new boyfriend recently, Jason, and he's been loads of help in keeping me sane and content. It just sucks having to be in another internet relationship. The last relationship I had was a disaster to be honest. He lied to me for the whole month we were together. Really upset me and left me questioning my gullibility. I just hope I'm not setting my heart up for another episode of destruction.

Lastly, I started going to therapy again so I'm sure that will help as well. I hadn't been to therapy in a long while and I have to see a new person since my last therapist retired and moved away. This new therapist is a really nice guy and he's pretty optimistic about the treatment he's going to use for me. Hopefully all goes well and I'll benefit more than I have been without therapy.

Oh, I've been totally addicted to the browser-based game called Forumwarz too. Its so much fun. I have a level 13 Hacker character. Its fun to pretend to be a really smart female hacker and pwn made-up forums. I finished episode one and I'm trying to find a way to get to play episode two, since you have to actually pay money to play it. *sigh*

Lastly, I made a paypal account the other day as well, although I'm not sure why. I know I'll probably never use it. I suppose I should maybe make out a Christmas list since I'm bored.

- Forumwarz Episode 2
- A new microphone
- A laptop
- Mario Party DS
- A Nintendo Wii
- Witch Hunter Robin DVD box set
- Trigun DVD box set

That's all I can think of and that's probably hoping for way too much. Eheh. ^^;

Bleh.

Well, I've slept for about... 30 hours... minus the few minutes it took to call in sick to work again and use the bathroom. Gah. I hate being so sick. When I called in sick to work I talked to the manager who I was going to talk with one-on-one last night. Its so hard to say to him that I hate my job and want to quit because he's a fairly nice guy. I really need to muster up more courage next time... or write a note. I'm good at writing notes to people when I can't speak what I want to say. *sigh* At least I feel a little bit better now, physically. Tomorrow is definitely going to be just me calling places all around town for job information. For now I'm gonna grab some food and wander around the internet I guess.